A subtle variation on the title of this sophomore release from Hastings four-piece Kid Kapichi (made up of Ben Beetham on guitars, vocals, Eddie Lewis on bass, George Macdonald on drums and Jack Wilson on vocals, guitars) will already be known by some of us of a certain age as the catchphrase from an 80s gameshow called Bullseye. Said gameshow would end with the pair reaching the show’s finale asked if they would like to keep the prizes they had already won or risk it all on a six dart 101 or more shit or bust scenario, for a super, (smashing, great,) star prize that would only be revealed once the outcome of the challenge was known.  As you can probably guess (if you’ve never actually seen the show) said catchphrase was uttered more than it wasn’t and as such it left the failing contestants open to humiliation by TV as they saw their dream of a new car, caravan or new kitchen hauled off in front of their tear-filled eyes. Not unlike maybe, a few of those who voted Tory at the last UK general election must now be feeling.

Yes, I just mentioned politics folks, so if you prefer your music devoid of conscience you best look away now.

I actually first heard Kid Kapichi at the start of 2022 via the single and lead track here ‘New England’, largely because it features a mid-song rap tirade from the highly respected Bob Vylan, and after that opening blow to the senses, I was well and truly hooked and couldn’t wait to hear the full album. Bouncing in like a ‘We Care A Lot’ for the 2020s ‘New England’ is indeed a righteous sound. Punk as fuck yet not in your normally gnarly guitar driven sense. Nah, this bad boy swaggers around full of electro rap attitude and dares to tell those who campaigned for Britain to leave the EU what they have actually achieved. I’ll leave the rest for you to figure out.

After this explosive opener the remaining ten tracks that make up the album could have actually  been something of an anti-climax, but fear not folks, its only when the almost Oasis-like ‘Party At Number 10’ (an acoustic ode to the Partygate farce that basically saw the UK government laughing in the face of the entire country) pops up at track five that you actually get to draw breath, as the likes of ‘I.N.V.U’, ‘5 Days On (2 Days Off), ‘Rob The Supermarket’ and the immense ‘Super Soaker’ are all fist in the air anthems, delivered in vicious bite sized chunks of hook laden electro-beat punk.

‘Cops & Robbers’, which crops up mid album is perhaps my favourite track here, fusing the spirit of Tone Loc with the dancefloor anarchy of The Prodigy, it actually also reminds me of The Howling the band Towers Of London guitarist Rev formed after he left them and then guested on guitar with the twisted firestarters. 

It’s not all-party anthems though as the once again Oasis-like ‘Never Really Had You’ proves and if it were 1997 this track would have been instantly labelled Britpop rather than simply a top tune, and hats exactly what ‘Here’s What You Could Have Won’ is jam packed full of, as the closing one-two suckerpunch of the heavy as hell ‘Smash The Gaff’ and the ballad about working class poverty and its impact on mental health ‘Special’ (a song which has flashes of the 60s psych pop-end of early Blur) prove.

Expertly produced by Dom Craik from Nothing But Thieves ‘Here’s What You Could Have Won’ is indeed the musical equivalent of the 101 in six darts being hit during an episode of Bullseye. A middle finger to the establishment that so wants us all to fail, and a wakeup call for a music scene seemingly devoid of soul.

So, save up all your bus fare home and snap up a copy of ‘Here’s What You Could Have Won’ NOW!

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Author: Johnny Hayward